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1. Police: Kentucky john paid prostitute with $100 fuel card.
| Maybe she was feeling a little gassy? (0) |  0% |
| Was the john asking for an "Around the World". (1) | 14% |
| Prostitutes don't take American Express! Or so I'm told. (2) | 29% |
| He should have given her a Victoria's Secret gift card. (4) | 57% |
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1. A slice of cool, fresh watermelon is a juicy way to top off a Fourth of July cookout and one that researchers say has effects similar to Viagra.
| That'll make your meat well done! (0) | 0% |
| How many do I have to eat? It makes me gassy. (1) | 17% |
| A nice pair of melons has the same effect. (4) | 67% |
| Lock up your melons around teenagers! (1) | 17% |
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1. DC Metro workers snagged in sex sting. At one point the employees used the Metro loudspeaker system to facilitate an illicit sexual arrangement.
| Paging Mr. XXX, paging Mr. XXX, your hooker is on the Red Line. (2) | 25% |
| Wonder if I could pay using my farecard? (3) | 38% |
| This subway system is going down the tubes. (0) | 0% |
| WOW, a full-service transit system! (3) | 38% |
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1. Rising scrap metal prices, coupled with the lagging economy, have triggered a string of cemetery thefts across the nation. It's mostly the bronze markers and flower vases that draw thieves attention.
| That's why my loved ones get their flowers in a Dixie Cup. (4) | 67% |
| Why worry, I got my parents markers at "Signs R Us". (1) | 17% |
| Hey, I needed the money! (1) | 17% |
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1. Chrysler will offer wireless Internet access in 2009 models!
| I can multi-task; drive, eat a burger, surf the web, make a call. (1) | 9% |
| I'm glad, what could go wrong with that? (6) | 55% |
| Finally, internet porn in my car. (4) | 36% |
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1. House Democrats call for nationalization of refineries.
| What a great idea! (0) | 0% |
| It's the end of the world! (1) | 6% |
| Didn't Europe try that and fail? (1) | 6% |
| We should always emulate Venezuela. (5) | 29% |
| What are they smoking? (10) | 59% |
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1. Do you believe that global warming is man-made?
| No (11) | 69% |
| Yes (1) | 6% |
| Don't know (2) | 12% |
| Don't care (1) | 6% |
| Need more info (1) | 6% |
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1. From the Scotsman: Falling exam grades blamed on Wikipedia. It's littered with inaccuracies.
| I had to look up 'inaccuracies'! (2) | 15% |
| Isn't littering illegal? (7) | 54% |
| Wikipedia? That's a foot disease, right? (4) | 31% |
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1. The majority opinion stressed that the Court was not casting doubt on bans on gun possession by felons or the mentally retarded, or laws barring guns from schools or government buildings, or laws putting conditions on gun sales.
| This was the right decision (1) | 14% |
| This was the wrong decision (0) | 0% |
| The decision was too broad (0) | 0% |
| The decision was too narrow (6) | 86% |
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1. U.S. searches for salmonella in Mexico
| Man, I hope they get that guy! (3) | 21% |
| Isn't Sal Monella in the Mafia? (4) | 29% |
| I hope salmonella is easier to find than Osama. (7) | 50% |
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